It is so hard to leave—until you leave. And then it is the easiest goddamned thing in the world.
1. When I lay next to you, tears eroding my pink cheeks, you lay soundly, sleeping.
2. I walked the line with her the other night, you hardly care if I drove over it.
3. They all text me all the time, where are you?
4. ‘I want you,’ they all say. I look to you.
5. I held her hand all night while she cried. She then kissed me. I closed my eyes and thought it was you.
6. ‘Stop with her, she isn’t good enough for you, you know you’ll get bored,’ still I wait.
7. And wait.
8. The music was loud and the alcohol strong, the lights bright and the kisses violent. Still you were the strongest thing on my mind.
9. You are my sixth, seventh and eighth senses. Your touch, your smell and your promises.
10. It was raining tonight. I had 84 texts to respond to. I didn’t even look at my phone until your name was attached to 85.
Most days I wish I’d never met you ‘cause then I could sleep at night. I didn’t have to walk around with the knowledge that there was someone like you out there. I didn’t have to watch you throw it all away.